About Me


I was born twice: the first time as a seven pounds three oz forceps baby, at eight minutes past five in the afternoon on Tuesday 1st August, 1978; the latter, as an eight stone teenager on a blizardous November night in 1992.

I don’t remember those first fourteen years: not the early stories at bedtime or the bookish tweens where I devoured every fairy story by CS Lewis and Lewis Carrol and and Lyman Frank Baum; and I can’t remember collecting Garbage Pail Kid stickers in 1985 or pouring that bowl of cornflakes over my own head then blaming my younger sister. But these are things that I’ve been told I did, previous to receiving the traumatic brain injury which obliterated my past and left me with the hilarious inability to remember where I’m going, what I’m doing, and where I’ve just been.

Since then I’ve acquired a book deal, a creative writing degree, a microphone phobia, an addiction to prison dramas, and an obsession with collecting pocket dragons and 80s memorabilia.

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